Top Five Charity Singles That Aged Like Milk

There was a time when every cause, crisis or vaguely heartfelt moment spawned a charity single — a slightly chaotic gathering of pop stars earnestly singing about world peace while wearing sunglasses indoors.

And while the intentions were good, not all of these tracks have stood the test of time. In fact, some have curdled spectacularly. Here are five charity singles that, for one reason or another, have aged like milk left on a windowsill in July.

5. Band Aid 20 – “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” (2004)

The idea: Recreate the magic of 1984’s original Band Aid with a fresh generation of stars.

The reality: Dizzee Rascal awkwardly rapping over earnest vocals from Dido, Jamelia and a visibly confused Chris Martin. It meant well, but it sounded like several songs playing at once.

Why it aged badly: The lyrics, already questionable in the ’80s (“Thank God it’s them instead of you”), felt even more uncomfortable two decades later — and by the time Band Aid 30 rolled around in 2014, everyone was begging them to stop.

Redeeming feature: A weirdly solid guitar solo from Justin Hawkins of The Darkness.

4. “We’re Sending Our Love Down the Well” – The Simpsons (1992)

The idea: Technically a fictional charity single, but so spot-on it deserves a spot. Bart Simpson’s “tribute” to his supposedly trapped alter ego, Timmy O’Toole, lampooned the real charity single craze — complete with cheesy rhymes and celebrity cameos.

The reality: The parody hit too close to home. By the ’90s, there really were that many earnest, slightly cynical “we are the world” copycats clogging up Top of the Pops.

Why it aged badly: It’s still brilliant, but it accidentally became more documentary than satire.

Redeeming feature: That perfect line — “Sending our love down the well!” — complete with gospel choir.

3. Ferry Aid – “Let It Be” (1987)

The idea: A star-studded cover to raise money for victims of the Zeebrugge ferry disaster. A noble cause.

The reality: A Frankenstein’s monster of production choices — Paul McCartney crooning next to Boy George, Kim Wilde and Mel & Kim, before suddenly cutting to Gary Moore shredding a rock solo like it’s Live Aid 2.

Why it aged badly: It’s the most ’80s-sounding thing ever recorded. Earnest, overproduced, and stuffed with so many key changes it feels like you’re climbing stairs in roller skates.

Redeeming feature: Seeing Macca sing his own Beatles song badly remixed for charity is weirdly endearing.

2. BBC Children in Need – “Perfect Day” (1997)

The idea: A lush, respectful cover of Lou Reed’s “Perfect Day” featuring a who’s who of British music and media.

The reality: David Bowie, Bono, and Tom Jones awkwardly handing verses to Boyzone and Lesley Garrett. It was beautifully produced — but also deeply confusing, like a musical round of Have I Got News for You.

Why it aged badly: In hindsight, it feels less like a charity single and more like a strange cultural time capsule where everyone from Heather Small to Shane MacGowan gets eight bars each.

Redeeming feature: Lou Reed himself apparently loved it, which is more than you’d expect.

1. “Spirit of the Forest” – Various Artists (1989)

The idea: A rainforest benefit single featuring an all-star line-up — including Ringo Starr, Kate Bush, Debbie Harry, and… Bros.

The reality: A chaotic plea to “save the world’s rainforests” sung in that painfully over-enunciated charity-single style. Half the singers clearly recorded their lines without hearing the rest.

Why it aged badly: The song is nearly impossible to listen to without flashbacks to pastel blazers and earnest head-bobbing. It also accidentally rhymes “pollution” with “solution.”

Redeeming feature: Kate Bush doing her best to sound like she’s not wondering why she’s there.