Supporting Loved Ones With Dementia

Rosie Hutchinson, an Alzheimer’s Society Dementia Adviser, shares the best ways for carers to support people living with dementia 

A recent survey published by Alzheimer’s Society found that 70% of unpaid carers say they have experienced a negative impact due to caring for someone with dementia, with 37% reporting a negative impact on their mental health and almost half reporting they feel socially isolated and have less time to do the things they enjoy, highlighting the challenges faced by those caring for people with dementia. 

With one in three people born today likely to develop dementia in their lifetime, dementia impacts not just individuals but entire families and communities. Currently, one million people are living with dementia in the UK, projected to rise to 1.4 million by 2040. Across East and West Sussex there are over 31,600 people living with dementia. 

Despite the prevalence of dementia, one in three people living with dementia do not have a diagnosis. Early and accurate diagnosis is crucial for assessing treatment and support that can help manage symptoms and prevent a crisis. 

Rosie said, “Caring for someone with dementia presents unique challenges that can feel overwhelming. Alzheimer’s Society receive thousands of calls to our Dementia Support Line every month, and we know the period before, during, and after diagnosis is particularly difficult for families.” Here are Rosie’s top tips for supporting a loved one with dementia: 

Reassure them that they’re still them

Dementia can affect how a person sees themselves. It can knock their confidence and make them question who they are and what their role is within their family or community. Let them know you still think of them as the person they’ve always been, rather than defining them by their dementia. Focus on what they can do and how they can still contribute. 

Try to understand changes in behaviour

Dementia can cause changes in mood and behaviour. Some of these are relatively benign, such as becoming more reliant on a daily routine or wanting to eat different things. However, others can cause distress. 

People with dementia may become agitated, frustrated or fearful. They can think things that aren’t true or see things that aren’t there. If this happens, stay calm and try to consider what they’re thinking or feeling in that moment. Try to work out why they’re upset and provide as much reassurance as you can. Use gentle persuasion where you can, but try not to argue, as this rarely helps. Sometimes it can help to provide a distraction or change the topic of conversation. 

Keep up relationships with family and community

It’s important to try to keep existing relationships going as otherwise it 

can lead to increasing isolation, both for the person with dementia and those who support them. Join social groups, community activities, or visit dementia cafés where you can connect with others facing similar challenges. You can find information about local services on the Alzheimer’s Society website (details below). 

Adapt your communication style

People with dementia may struggle to find the right words or follow the thread of conversations. They may have difficulty hearing you in places with lots of background noise.

Give them more time to think things through and work out what they want to say. Be patient and use short, simple sentences. Sometimes it can help to speak a little more slowly than usual, but not too much – as this can actually make you harder to understand. Maintain eye contact and use non-verbal communication, such as smiles and physical gestures – just as you would do for anyone else, but perhaps a little more deliberately. And never use infantilising or patronising language that treats them as anything less than an adult. 

Prioritise your own wellbeing 

It can be tough to suddenly find yourself in a caring or supporting role. It can feel very daunting. It’s important to use whatever support you can find to help you get through it, whether this be friends and family, local dementia support groups, or health and social care professionals. Don’t feel that you need to do everything by yourself. Everyone needs regular breaks to recharge their batteries and continue to do the things they love. 

Support around the clock 

If you’re worried about dementia, or need support, Alzheimer’s Society is here to help. Call the Dementia Support Line on 0333 150 3456 or visit alzheimers.org.uk